Bijoux

‘Bijoux’ Egger – June 16, 2010 – June 7, 2025

By: Bijoux’s mommy, Pamela

My dearest Bijoux – My little, precious princess, greatest love of all, light of my life, forever in my heart and soul.

My heart was so unbearably aching and completely broken into pieces the day that my dear, precious little Bijoux passed away peacefully at home in my arms on June 7, 2025. She was nine days short of 15 years. Our special bond has made the loss of her the most difficult experience in my life. We shared everything together in life just the two of us for almost 15 years. She was and meant so much more than my companion pet. She was my best friend, one-and-only heart dog, soul mate, and loyal and trusted companion always by my side for everything I did in life at home, travel, work-from-home, and play. She was my proverbial shadow, my only daughter – in lieu of a human one. She was my most constant, unwavering source of love. She brought me pure happiness and the ability to be in the present moment. She gave me, without me ever having a moment of doubt, her love, loyalty, acceptance, and connection, every single moment of every day. Bijoux’s unconditional, loving force of life was right beside me everywhere I went, made easily possible because she was only a tiny 3.6 pounds and loved travelling and going about everywhere and anywhere with me. Like a human daughter, she made me a better person. Living on without Bijoux leaves a heartbreak and void in my life like no other I have felt or ever will feel. Without her, a part of me is missing every day.

Still, experiencing this special love with my dear, precious Bijoux was worth every second of my life for the past 15 years. As life dished out the grueling hardships it did, she was always by my side with love and affection without debate, only full acceptance of my feelings, giving me comfort, and being my reason to move forward – I had her in my life! She helped me learn about a love bond and connection I didn’t know before. But having experienced a love with her that was so special, deep, and connected comes the harsh, unbearable other side of that – the constant heartache and massive void of no longer having Bijoux with me.

From the very first moment I saw Bijoux through the mesh windows of a pet travel carrier held up by a pet courier from Florida at Seattle airport, I felt instant joy!! She was perfect – with her little, fluffy, white hair and white and taffy-colored ears, tiniest-ever button of a nose, curious little soft eyes, tiniest little pink tongue, and so precious being just under two pounds as a new puppy. All my worries about being a good mommy were washed away by the overwhelming joy and instant knowing that she and I were meant to be together. During the entire drive back to Vancouver, I sang to her “You Are My Sunshine” which is the song my mom always sang to me and all her children and grandchildren. I knew it well because my mom sang it to me throughout my life. I will always remember being so happy and thrilled to be Bijoux’s mommy from that moment on.

For Bijoux’s first couple of nights at home, she missed her litter siblings and biological mom. Her whimpers were heart wrenching and so I slept on the heated bathroom floor by her side, with her in her little pink puppy bed she came with and me on a blanket, so that she could feel my presence and warmth beside her. She was less than two pounds as a new puppy and so I was concerned about accidentally crushing her by sleeping by her in a bed. Bijoux was too precious and tiny for a cold, empty, lifeless crate on her own! It took less than a week, and she decided/figured out that she would sleep on my pillow right beside my head. No more concern about rolling over on little, tiny Bijoux! So she and I decided (well, really, she told me and I agreed) that my pillow would be her sleeping place at night her whole life, though she soon got her own pillow right beside mine. I loved hearing the sound of her breathing by my head falling to sleep each night. I loved each night before sleep, watching her nightly routine of scratching around in circles on my or her pillow to “make” her sleep spot before laying down curled in a little white fluff ball, and then winding up her nightly sleep ritual by making faint little smacking sounds from sliding her tiny little tongue just so slightly out of her little lips, one spaced-apart-lick at a time, until she drifted off to sleep. Oh, how I miss the sound of her breathing beside my head and her faint little lip smacks every night now.

In our first year together, one way to give Bijoux some puppy play time was I made an obstacle / agility course out of my sofa and sofa cushions, big and small (I had many), all in a circle around my Vancouver condo living room. She loved being challenged to jump from little pillow to sofa chair to big pillow pile to sofa, around and around the pillow-sofa-sofa chair agility course until exhaustion.

I soon learned that Bijoux liked to be perched up high when hanging out with me on the sofa or going for a drive in the RAV. So, around her second year with me, I got rid of the slippery leather sofa with no back cushions and I bought a new sofa made of fabric and with wide back cushions so she could jump up to top of the wide back cushions to hang out, sleep, or watch over all from up high. She absolutely loved it and would jump up there on her own to “her place” every day, so the sofa change was worth every dollar! Unfortunately for her, for rides in the RAV, although she would always try to climb up onto my shoulders and lay across my shoulders and back of my neck, mommy had to keep her zipped up in her seat-belted carrier for her safety.

Bijoux was so good at hiding in my backpack with mesh sides or a very large purse that I bought with hidden mesh top/sides, she made it possible for me to have her with me everywhere in Vancouver or wherever I travelled. Bijoux could not be tied up outside a store or restaurant or anywhere alone – it was not safe for her! Bijoux made it so easy to go shopping in any store that did not allow dogs and sitting on a café or restaurant patio even if it was not “dog-friendly” because as soon as I put her into the purse/bag or backpack and I said “Shhhush!”, she would nestle in and not make a peep the whole time. When we would get outside on the street again, I would unzip my backpack or camouflage purse and she would pop out like a jack-in-the box! That was the beginning of some saying Bijoux was not like a typical dog. So true, I agree for so many reasons and experiences, and she certainly was not what one would expect from 3.6 pound dog full adult weight.

From my very first year with Bijoux, I soon discovered her love for chasing and retrieving – yes retrieving without even training her to retrieve – the tiniest sized green ball, that looked like a mini-tennis ball. She was so smart that if I wasn’t paying attention after she first retrieved it, she developed the know-how of pushing the ball to me with her nose, to get me to throw it again. If we were outside in grassy park in Vancouver, any on-lookers would smile and laugh at her “trick” to get mommy to throw the ball again! She developed an even cuter talent from me not responding the first time after she retrieved the ball and nosed it to me, in which case she would nose it repeatedly with so much effort the ball would fly into the air from her little tiny nose.

Bijoux’s favourite play time was in a grassy Vancouver park, waiting for a little tiny green ball to be thrown as far as you can, then whether she could either see or hear it bounce, she would run like a rocket in the direction of the ball toss. She may find the little ball right away and run back to me with it in her mouth, eager for me to throw again. If she didn’t find it right away, she would search and search, without ever giving up, in what at first was a wide and even search pattern and then might eventually turn into a scattered one (depending how long it took her to find the ball). I always resisted walking to and pointing out the ball before Bijoux could find it. I just felt that I would rob her the sense of achievement and confidence from finding it on her own. Yes, sometimes I would wait for over five minutes, depending on how far the ball was tossed and if the terrain was convoluted. Keeping in mind her line of sight was only six inches above ground level; she soon revealed to me her me her tenacity and persistence which left me in awe and with laughing smiles. There were times, other passersby would stop and watch her in her mid-search pattern (Bijoux was such a special attraction, she often would draw a small crowd in a public park), and when she finally found that little, green ball in the grass, she would get a loud cheer from all! Bijoux’s love for this activity was so great that every time she would get near the smell of grass, she would squeal and run out in it waiting and looking for the ball to be tossed.

Another of Bijoux’s favorite play time fun was playing with squeaky toys at home. She would become ecstatic at the sound of anyone squeaking a small squeaky toy. She would run and jump up at it in my hand standing on her hind legs, and upon my throwing it, she would chase it down and carry it to a yoga mat or the sofa to make her own squeaking fest with it. Since Bijoux’s jaw was so tiny, even for the smallest of squeaky toys, she could not get as much squeak out of it as she liked when trying to squeak it in her jaw. So, she came up with her method of carrying the toy to a surface with traction (thus, I put out a yoga mat on the hardwood floor in the living room for her), and she would stomp on it with her front paws or push it into the yoga mat with her nose. By this method, she could create multiple very loud squeaks rapidly in row, repeatedly for long periods of time. If I was listening to a TV show or a movie, I would need to turn up the volume to hear over top of her toy squeaking party. Even more special about Bijoux being so tiny with a small jaw, she never wore out or could destroy any of her toys. But she was ecstatic over a new toy – especially if it was gifted to her wrapped in tissue paper. She would paw away at the paper in circles, finally shredding it away to reveal the new toy inside. She loved a new toy so much over an older and used one, so she would play with and squeak a new toy that much longer, and it would be her go-to squeaky toy for days or weeks, neglecting all the others in her toy basket. Over the years, Bijoux’s squeaky toy collection in her toy basket grew to over many dozens of little critters of all types, including cat toys that chirped. She was so resourceful, she would crawl into her toy basket (it’s top was about six inches off the floor which was as high as her) to toss out toys to play with on her own or I would tip the basket on its side. When I did that, she could easily get at so many more toys, and she would play for hours pulling them out one-by-one and playing with/squeaking each, one at a time, leaving ten or fifteen toys scattered all over the condo living room floor after she was fully satisfied and played out.

Bijoux also loved going for bike rides in the basket fastened to the front bars of my bike. Well, technically, it wasn’t a bike basket as they all were too big for Bijoux to see out over the top. Instead, I got her a lunch carrying accessory for touring bikes, as that was smallest type of carrying pouch that attached safely to the bike handlebars. This way she could sit in it and look out as we rode along, feeling the wind on her face. When she got a whiff of grass while riding in the handlebar pouch, I had to ride by holding her down in the pouch with one hand – she was so excited to go chase her little green ball. As we rode along, she would sit up and look out with so much joy, her long white hair on her face, head, and long ears swept back by the wind. From time to time, she would look up and back at me during our rides (before she lost her eyesight at around 12 years old), and when I would lean forward towards her, she would give me a kiss. I would still do the same after she lost her eyesight and she would give me a kiss from the sound of my voice.

When in the condo on rainy Vancouver days, I would provide her inside fun by combining her obsession with searching for and retrieving the green ball with a couple of wide, square pillows stacked on top of each other. I would place the little ball on the top of the stacked pillows, ensuring the height was just right for her to jump on top of the pillow stack. Over time, she could jump up on pillows stacked higher and higher. Gradually, she created play time on her own by jumping to the top of the stacked pillows holding the little, green ball in her mouth, drop it on top, and toss the ball off the pillow stack with her nose. She would do this with her squeaky toys too. Then she would jump down to the floor and do the same thing over and over. If the ball rolled too far, under a low-to-the-floor sofa and/or sofa-chair, she would stand beside it and call me with cute little squeals to come get the ball. Mommy would pull it out and she would carry on with the same climb-up-pillow-stack/toss-ball-off game for hours.

She evolved into such an unexpected jumper and athlete for her tiny little size. Her jumping accomplishments included from the floor to the top of the sofa (by her figuring out a running start at it, she could jump up from the hardwood floor without a mat for traction), from the ground to seats on park benches, onto the tops of those high driftwood logs on Jericho Beach, the steps and obstacles of the BCMC trail to the top of Grouse Mountain (approx. 3 km), and her ultimate achievement of hiking and jumping was the steep, dirt trail steps from the very bottom of the Grand Canyon to the very top all on her own. Yes, my little, precious, white fluffy 3.6-pound Bijoux hiked from the top to the bottom and up to the top again of the Grand Canyon in Utah, US. It helped that by that time in our lives together, Paul was along for us to both look out for her.

Bijoux’s smarts and sense of adventure expanded with Paul around. Paul liked to give Bijoux all kinds of new challenges I never thought of for Bijoux, perhaps out of a mommy’s caution or simply not contemplating the idea, thinking it’s not something she could do because she was too small and fragile. Well, low and behold, with Paul’s sense of adventure and Bijoux being the little princess warrior she was, I found out that Bijoux could: swim in a lake (though water was not her favorite, yet after that, it gave me the option to have her do laps in the bathtub for exercise!), be the top ornament of a huge sand castle build out in the low tidal sand pools at Jericho beach, swim inland in the low water of the in-coming tide (with mom’s eyes pealed too ensure her tiny little nose stayed above the water), have her pristine, white, long fluffy hair became caked with mud and sand chasing her little ball all over the tidal sands, be pushed on top of a skim board, and ride on top of a paddle board and a canoe across a lake (with a doggy life jacket). Also, only Paul would think of challenging Bijoux by throwing her little green ball into tall grass or a grassy field – it was such a scene to behold, to watch Bijoux jump around in the tall grass, exploring and looking for her ball, jumping as high as the tall grass looking like a little white rabbit. And then there was the driftwood log obstacle course at Big Lillooet Lake camp, where Paul challenged Bijoux to walk and jump from driftwood to driftwood shored up along the beach into a long line of logs that overlapped and touched from log to log in a long line, ranging in size and length, with her goal being to go from end to end without touching the sand! Each time she fell off the driftwood log obstacle course part way along, he would have her start from the beginning again, until after repeated attempts she rocked it from end to end! She never gave up – and I just adored her competitiveness and perseverance for such a tiny little girl!

During the years I was working from the office, I would leave Bijoux home alone as little as possible. In the first two years that she was a puppy, I would ride my bike home every three to four hours to give her food and play time to stimulate her, to not leave her home alone. When my work office moved further away from downtown Vancouver, my commute was too long to bike back during the day. So, I tried to sign up Bijoux for a doggy daycare. She was too small for regular ones and so the only option was a local small-dogs-only one. When I took Bijoux in for a meet-and-greet and to apply, she trembled so much and crawled up my shoulders and snuggled into my neck as if saying, “No, mommy, don’t leave me here”. Upon observing her, the people who ran the daycare informed me that it would not be good for her to be left there. In her early years, I also once tried a dog sitter at home for Bijoux for a weekend I went away to a retreat, but Bijoux never came out from laying on my clothes on the bottom shelf of my closet. When I checked in by phone with the sitter and told her to take Bijoux out of the closet and close my closet door, Bijoux never came out from under my desk in my home office. So, Bijoux and I decided (well, really, she told me) that she would be better off at home alone while I was at work or along with me if I travelled.

After all those attempts, I came to feel ok about Bijoux being better off at home alone while I was at work. She didn’t show any signs of damaging or soiling the condo or being emotionally distressed any days she was on her own all day. She had a pee pad in the corner and a bowl of water and food. She was more distressed with other dogs and other people. That outcome has left me with one of my fondest and heartfelt memories of Bijoux. Bijoux always let me feel that she missed me as much as I missed her when I would be at work at the office every day. Every single evening when I returned home from work, she was at the door waiting and as soon as I opened it she threw the biggest party of joy and welcome home that I have ever felt nor knew could happen. Every time, I would sit right down there on the floor inside the door, and she would jump all over my lap, jump up to my shoulders, lick my face and nose, squeaking sounds of “I missed you” for over a good five-ten minutes!! She would have the same response every single time I came home from work – I am forever grateful for knowing that feeling of being greeted like that coming home every time!

Bijoux wasn’t interested in going to other people or dogs. Before I got Bijoux, I had thought that she might be a therapy dog and she and I could do a good deed by touring senior homes and children’s hospitals to lift their sprits. Well, right from the get-go, Bijoux would only let mommy hold her – she let me know that she was only for me and only me for her. If anyone would try to hold Bijoux, she would immediately squirm and squiggle in their arms to the point that it became concerning she would be accidently dropped to the ground. Yet, it was sure an irony because Bijoux drew so much attention and love from all kinds of people – from all walks of life – little kids, seniors, macho men, gay men, teenagers, young children, young and middle aged men and women in suits or casual wear, including one ‘cool’ young man who told me he didn’t like dogs, but she was the first! On sidewalks in Vancouver in our neighborhoods in South Granville, Granville Island, and Kitsilano, as soon anyone looked down the sidewalk far enough to spot Bijoux approaching while I was walking her on a leash, I would see their faces light up with big smiles. At a park, when anyone spotted Bijoux, they would come over to see her closer and ask to hold her or pet her. Although, a short petting was all she would allow, I always fondly recall all the moments of happiness and smiles that Bijoux brought to everyone’s faces, and the sounds of their “ooo’s and awe’s” they called out about her. Being able to observe and experience others’ joy from seeing Bijoux and petting her was one of the many blessings she brought to my life!

Out of the blue, Bijoux showed me two exceptions to not letting anyone else hold her or care for her – first was auntie Christina and uncle Francois, which started by playdates that Christina called for alone with Bijoux at her condo. Christina nailed it when she became the mommy to Bijoux’s half-brother, Coda (amazingly, by pure co-incidence from her own separate search for one of these special Mi-Ki dogs). That brought several years of fun playdates of cuteness and adorableness to see Bijoux and Coda play together, knowing Bijoux would play with no other dog before that. Bijoux was always excited to go their place and would squeal with joy when we walked up to the door of their building. She knew where we were going!! The second exception was Paul, though Paul would jokingly say that Bijoux would “tolerate” him only because she knew I was either at work or travelling for work and so he was all she had left for the time being. I know Bijoux trusted and liked Paul because I could leave her in his care and she was healthy, happy and very well cared for when I returned.

By the time of Bijoux’s tenth birthday, Paul threw her a party in grand style, one which she would not have had without his event planning talents. Paul baked Bijoux a cake and decorated it as a cute puppy face, accompanied with a flowerpot bouquet of blue hydrangeas, a bouquet of colorful balloons, and a card with a pack of dogs on the front, all of which Bijoux posed beside on the dining room table (as an exception!), for her special birthday photo shoot. After the photo shoot, we moved all her party fixings and a blanket for a celebration at the park we called “the Bijoux park” (i.e., a school yard with a big field of green grass, without any duck poop, which post school hours was free of people, kids or other dogs). The special guests were auntie Christina and Coda. Bijoux’s presents were ten color-tissue wrapped liver treats, which she ripped open with squawks of glee. Bijoux and Coda chased and ran after little balls and badminton birdies until dusk, and left us all with lots of laughs, joy, and cherished memories of her most special birthday party.

From the very beginning with Bijoux in my life, I never ever wanted to be on a vacation without Bijoux, and she hated being left behind. She would make this obviously known by crawling into my suitcase or bag in the hallway anytime I was packing a bag or suitcase to go anywhere. She could always detect if I was packing to leave overnight. Upon taking out a suitcase to pack, Bijoux would immediately crawl inside, and so I would move her from one side of the suitcase to the other to finish packing. If I packed the suitcase the night before leaving on a trip, she would crawl in and sleep in the suitcase the entire night (even though on the pillow beside my head was her preferred spot) as her insistence to tell me to not leave without her. Her consistent and persistent message to me about that each and every time was what grew our bond even deeper. She let me know to never leave her behind – and so I didn’t anymore, and our bond became even greater by her being along with me everywhere I travelled. That’s how it came to be that Bijoux came with me on a three-day hike in and out of the Grand Canyon (even though technically dogs are not allowed). She and I were inseparable!

Bijoux was already a global traveller before that, travelling with me on vacations to Quebec City and Montreal (two times each, the first time being the second week after Bijoux came into my life, thus I named her Bijoux – the most perfect name for her!), France (three times – she even had a French passport – and sat on my lap at the table of a fine dining white tablecloth restaurant in Paris for the entire dinner), London (sitting up on bench seats on my lap in pubs), Copenhagen, Prague, Mexico (climbed the top of the Aztec ruins), the entire west coast of the US (Washington, Oregon and northern and southern California), western Canada (Alberta and Saskatchewan – to get some TLC from her grandparents with a stop on the drive back to BC to walk the sand dunes in SK during an sudden huge windstorm), Vancouver Island with family (including sailing on the Gloman Magic sailboat), Whistler (many times as my running partner doing laps around Lost Lake), Pemberton, cross-country skiing at Callaghan and Sun Peaks (she would run in the snow behind my skis and chase me for many kilometres), and countless camping trips all over BC. If it were cold at night camping in the tent, sleeping on my pillow was too chilly for her zero-fat, white fluffy hair only / furless little body, so she would snuggle down inside my sleeping bag – but her strong-willed side would come out if she didn’t get enough space to sleep inside there. She would let out a feisty growl – telling me to move over – that would wake Paul in the tent too. But it didn’t matter, Bijoux was also a perfect match for me in that she always was so good at sleeping in every morning – we had many sleep-ins when camping, as we did at home on weekends.

In her senior years, Bijoux and I continued to take such good care of each other. When she started experiencing some health challenges in her last two years, including her kidney decline and losing her eyesight, I would search out the best medical care for her to the extent it was the best thing to do for her. Bijoux bounced back so many times when she needed help from medical care, and she let me know she was so happy to keep on being together, by eating, drinking, playing a little by rolling on her toys and in the grass in the yard, and most of all, by always getting up and walking around the room searching for me if she hadn’t heard my voice in the same room for while.

Bijoux was happy when we moved to a house in Lake Country, in the Okanagan. She had a huge yard of green grass immediately outside the sliding doors to the deck. She would roll around and round and bury her nose in the fresh green grass and take bouncy strides through it. No longer being able to fully see by this time, she sadly couldn’t chase her green ball. But after walking through and rolling in the grass, she would jump up and shake it off, then do it all over again.

In her last three years, Bijoux and I were never apart for even a minute, even though I travelled many times to Toronto for work. My friends at work always asked about her knowing she was with me during my trips there. I knew Bijoux needed me the most and that only I knew what she needed for her care as a senior, so she I and bonded even more by our inseparable time together during those years. Bijoux continued to bring me joy and happiness daily even through her senior years – even more than the joy and happiness that I felt the very first time I saw her through the mesh windows of that little pet travel carrier at the airport the day she came into my life. Caring for her as senior bonded us more deeply. I loved being by her side and giving her all the care she needed to stay as well as she could and pain free. She and I were happy and at peace as long as we were together every day to her very last breath.

Every single day, there is one most special experience I have had in life with Bijoux, which was; every morning for the past almost 15 years, the way I got to start my day every day was, from the first moment I would wake up and open my eyes, I would look over and see her adorable face right beside me on my or her pillow by my head, give her a morning greeting and kiss on her little head, and feel her soul-connected spirit light up my day.

Life with Bijoux for the past almost 15 years has been the most joy and happiness I have felt each and every day like no other time in my entire life. Being without her now is the most heartache and loss I have ever felt in life. It’s the part of life that inevitably comes with having the beautiful and amazing experience of being Bijoux’s mommy – of opening up to a love this unconditional, joyous, connected, accepting, and forgiving.

Bijoux, I miss you so very much. I feel blessed to have been your mommy. I have had so many life fulfilling memories because of you, my precious, little, sweetheart. I was able to know and feel a part of life that is filled with unconditional and accepting love like you gave me and showed me. I was able to experience true happiness and love by having you in my life. Throughout all these almost 15 years, you have been there for me with your unconditional love and support in moments that without you would have been more than unbearable. Your love was a deep bond and connection that got me through those low times and gave me my most joyous, happiest, and best times. I feel lost without you. There is a part of me missing without you, Bijoux. Please be at peace, my little one. You are forever in my heart and my soul, and you are always with me spiritually for the rest of my life here, until we are reunited when I join you across the rainbow bridge.